Thursday, August 9, 2012

come back entry

‘welcome back’, that is how most people have been greeting us since we landed at the airport. To me, it sounds more like, ‘welcome back to reality, you have got a long year ahead’. So smile now and cry later, they keep reminding us. Being away for couple of years abroad, I begin to appreciate the smallest thing about Malaysia. If there is anything I missed the most, it is really the food. trust me, a cold sandwich for lunch is not really what you would fancy. So as soon as I landed, I was already in the mood of stuffing my face with all the fast food restaurants and everything under the sun I’ve been dreaming of for the past few years. however living away few miles away from home does not do me any favour in losing weight, ironically. the part i enjoy the most when it comes to food is, really, the turkish kebab. i can say that most of my body fat is made of kebab. only talking about it makes my mouth watered. The training? I’m looking forward to putting all those theories into practice although I am well aware that teaching reality is not as easy as it looks. I know I am in for a surprise but hopefully, I am well-equipped with the right gears and tools for the bumpy ride. Perhaps i am just going to leave the academic part and tell you in another entry because it is going to take you until tomorrow morning to finish reading it. Anyhow, when I was in England, I shopped a bit, and travelled a lot. As u know, I am very keen of travelling. Come Louis Voutton and Chanel, I would still choose Switzerland. See how much I mean my words. It is not so much of ticking the boxes, been there, done that. Not really about the destination, but more of a journey that has no end. If there is one thing I am so thankful about this experience, it is the journey. The process of learning so many things about other cultures and the world. It broadens my experience to the horizon which is beyond my wildest imagination and brings me back as a new person. Not to mention all the missed buses, trains, and flights. let's face it, I have no luck with public transport. truth be told, my overseas education includes nights of watching films, online shopping at the comfort of our own house, polishing my skills in cooking(not to say that i'm not good at it) assignments, travelling, datelines to meet, and did i mention assignments? which some might say quite a balanced uni life. but to be honest, i do feel like i've missed out on something. i didnt get to spend much time wif my siblings especially my beloved younger brother and missed quite a precious moment in his growing up. i was not there for him, and couldnt help much with his education. a lot of catch up to do later on his life. now that i never miss to go home every weekeend i look forward to give free tuition during the weekend. (so far this just refers to us watching x men). All in all couple of years abroad has really changed the way I look at things.even though three years is not that long, but to be perfectly honest, I do feel the so-called culture shock. I know, cliché, right? But it really surprises me how the system works. I would never see this significant differences if I have not been there. Since I have, it is so hard to ignore. It’s a shame how people are not fond of thanking people in Malaysia. Let alone to be kind and help us out with anything else.and another thing that impresses me the most over there is the punctuality. When the British say a time, they mean it. Unlike us Malaysians, who are at the bottom of the list when it comes to punctuality.Having said this, it is something for me to reflect. And I have decided that it would be for me to bring the positive change and to leave all the negatives there. The master plan is, not to work against the society but to work with it. I know coming from a kampong background, and blessed with such an opportunity to even board an airplane, I will never stop counting my blessings. Now the phase is over, it is time to serve the country. As much as I would love to stay there and do even more travelling, it is time to pay back for this precious experience. Everything comes at a price. No more sitting idle in the comfort of my own room , doing online shopping and using up all the allowance. i'm going national. It is time to educate the nation. Pro patrio mori. and yeah, here is a self adoring image of myself.enjoy.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Saturday, March 31, 2012

spring 2012

masyaAllah.........indahnya ciptaan tuhan,

awal musim panas ini tamatlah sebuah perjalanan,

mengira detik untuk kembali pulang ke tanah air,

sambil menghabiskan sisa2 di bumi England ini,

dengan menghayati alam ciptaan-Nya....

haza min fadhli rabbi

Thank you Allah for everything~

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Friday, July 8, 2011

kembara istanbul

fleurs...never fail to mesmerised me

slm and bonjour! agagaga....tajuk x boleh belah...hmmm....rsenye x share lg gambo turkey kat blog kan? ke dah? xpela kan, refresh balik. haha. so utk u ols sume, here are some turkish stuff. Alhamdulillah, dengan izin-Nya, i finally managed to set my feet on the very first not-so-european-half-middle-east country, Turkey. saje nk letak backdated travel photos here nk decorate blog with experiences and stuff. xpela my blog ek pon. feast ur eyes.

blue mosque at night. was enjoying the magnifique sight.

topkapi palace

inside blue mosque-subhanallah, c'est tres bien!

up next,


till then. slm

p/s: I'VE PASSED MY EXAM!!!!! Alhamdulillah sujud penuh kesyukuran...kentaki, i'll be with u soon!

2nd visit to amsterdam avec ma familie

au printemps dernier, je suis alle a l'amsterdam avec ma famili. ma cousine, ma trois tante et ma grand mere. l'amsterdam, c'est petite ville en le pays bay. j'adore beaucop le ville. nous sommes alle au jardin. c'est magnifique! c'est bon! il y a beaucop de fleurs! j'aime a la folli le fleurs. ce sont les photos pour ma vacances et fleurs!

the 'i amsterdam'

flowerpark (keukenhof garden)-jardin fleurs?

the clog (amsterdam trademark)

the windmills. another trademark

Thursday, July 7, 2011

horse riding


as for this year, i am in the equastrian club. if not because of that horrible chris, i would have stayed for this year. or myb even next year. looking on the bright side, we'd never paid for that fencing club. yes. in other words, it was free. well, not officially free. technically free. we did try to pay but some people they were just too ignorant to take our payment. so there, we had a free fencing for a year. might as well pay with being the victim of that beginner chris.

too bad that this horse riding is too expensive. we need to pay like 18 pound per session. u should just buy ur own pony and can ride on it for the rest of ur life. honestly, i just went couple of times, just to keep my co-curricular report busy.these are some photos of us going for a hacks (i'm not sure if this is the right spelling. too lazy to google it) the other day. the weather was nice and seeing the countryside on a horse was a joyful experience. hope to go for some horseriding again in the near future. have a lovely summer everyone!

me in blue riding rupert, naughty lil horse.

i know, i've put on some weight ok. weight is just a number, so?

i look ridiculously happy

this horse was really giving me a hard time that day, he's gonna pay for it next time i show up.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011



i always start with that french greeting so that u r aware of ability to speak french ok. (just so u know) now so much for avoiding the dissertation,. i'm gonna write a super long entry. sooo long it will take a lifetime to finish reading it.

here it comes, the result is gonna be out in few days. still keeping my fingers crossed. and i really cannot take fail for a result this time around. i would kill if i have to. rather than having to come back earlier in august for a resit! ok let's put that aside for now and rant about something more cheerful, shall we? ranting and cheerful? dont collocate at all.

last month has witnessed me on the edge of commiting suicide. i've wasted almost a month of my life. those are the moments in life i'd never get back. no network, no job, no one to talk to, no telly, no traveelling, no nothing!it was a complete nightmare. the connection was down for few weeks and left me no choice but to read books. dont ask.

d heck? i am not an avid reader. but i can read. but reading would only fall second after internet and movies ok. nothing i can do in this life of mine to change it. it is decided long time ago that my language development should just stay between me and watching movies. and tv series. and facebook. and scrubs. ok enuff with that bullshit. and chess titan has made me sick. it was soo painful.being disconnected from the world and playing chess against the loser. and sitting in my room staring at the wall, the world seemed to stop.

but suddenly reality slapped me right in the face. well, if the world has survived for thousand years without youtube and facebook. then why should it come to an end now? yeah, why should it? just because i couldn connect, it's not the end of the world right? what a brilliant child i am to be able to think like that. and how i want myself to believe that. but no. it is simply absurd. it IS the end of the world. for me. but now that i've got my life back, let's just pass on that one.

meanwhile, guess who is not packing for home yet. yes. me.i am somewhat surprised by the fact that i still havent even started packing for my huliday. what happens to all those balik kampung spirit? that home-is-where-ur-heart is spirit. ok2, lemme spill this to u. i'm going on a huliday. yes, this time my dream huliday destination is....temerloh bandar ikan patin!!!! so thrills me just to think that i am less than one week away from home.

mind u, this is my first trip abroad alone. on my own. quite nervous here i must admit. wat if something bad happen? who should i lean to? i dun wanna miss that flight. thinking of that alone makes me shiver. i dont wanna mess up. i just...wanna go home... honestly, this foreign land is really eating my soul. soul sister...alrite2, i love it here, but not when i am penniless.

well...a super long entry huh? even the sky has limit. u shud be ashamed of urself that for giving that false premise z.

Monday, July 4, 2011

growing up

back then, when i was small, dad used to bring us to the seasides or waterfalls for a family vacation. but being a young child who didnt loike nature that much, i used to beg for something more adventurous like sunway lagoon or any other famous waterpark and tourist attraction. but he said 'no, i cant afford that kind of luxury' i mean with the 7 of us, we couldnt really afford to go anywhere with fares. so my parents decided it was all gonna be waterfalls and seasides. mom cooked the meal and off we went. simple as it is. the cheapest my parents could think of u. but i'm glad they've ever done something like that u know. now that i get to travel the world, i miss waterfalls and seasides.

anyways, there were 7 of us and in every journey, we always fought who get to be in mom's car. nobody wanted to be in dad's. hardly know why. i didnt care much really. other than the fact that he was (and still is) a reckless driver, i was always good to go.the thing is, wif my family, the bigger wins. so we used to end up wif my older sister and me got to be in whichever car we liked(the bless of being the early borns). the same rule applies when the balik raya time comes. but fadhli seems to start accepting his fate being in dad's car. he never gave a damn really.

honestly, i really miss those moment of growing up. we used to fight for everything in life. everything, u name it. clothing, books, toys (which we hardly had any) and any other stupid things u can think of including car seat.during my days of riding, we had sort of seating territories where nobody can enter someone else's. this, occasionally resulted in a serious fight of territories. and mom would pull over anywhere and threatened to throw us out of the window if we didnt stop. which normally worked. yeah i know, so stupid. but now that we all live far from home, i terribly miss them.

i still remember we only had one ringgit for canteen time. and we needed to ask for another 50 cent if we would like to buy a drink. and if my memory still serves me right, mom raised the pocket money to 1.50 a day when i grew a bit older. but i can assure u, it used to be only one ringgit because i still remember the pain of having to choose between the meal with a chicken, and a drink, owing to the fact that the meal with chicken would definitely finish up my money leaving me with no other choice but to drink from the tap (i know, disgusting) but that's what children do. they drink tap water. whether u know it or no. alternatively, i would just ask from any of my siblings. well, all of us were in the same school, so not having some pennies isnt really a tough life if u have a good sister.

we used to share secrets. most of the time secret about boys and crush (u know, girlish stuff). my sis's deepest darkest secret is just in my pocket.and mine is in hers. so technically i would know whoever my sis got crushed with and she, mine. i would always use it against her when she messed up with me and she wud enjoy the same pleasure. there u have it. mutualism. but when it comes to the art of blackmailing no one can really beat my other sister. she would know everything about us and gave us hell for starting a fight with her. so we used to stay away from her.but now, if someone has got a boyfriend, need not to announce, the world will know. and blackmailing is no longer trendy.

then we got into boarding school. all of us. and we did see each other a lot. given that we went to the same school. after finishing high school everyone chooses different path in life. my older sis is graduating in her engineering course in september, i am becoming an english teacher real soon, the 3rd one is doing pharmacy in australia, the 4th is doing her preparation for dentistry in the uk, the 5th is sitting for spm this year, the 6th one is in form 2, while the last one is still being pampered at home by my aunt's family. mom was tranferred to Damansara and the little one is now schooling with his cousins.

funny how things work. but i used to really hate my siblings. but now they mean the world to me. i'm proud of them i can never tell,(call me bragging, in fact, my chest is swelling with pride. it would be a blatant lie if i say i am not!) to be honest, i think it's an achievement for a poor family like us. Alhamdullilah rezeki tuhan nak bagi. and never stop counting the blessing! looking back, i wish i could provide a better life for my children (not not saying mine is horrible) but they would definitely get to go to the waterpark!

raya 2007 (y 3 kat depan to silap theme. it was supposed to be green yaw!)

raya 2008

raya 2009 (now for 2 years, that is one same setting!)

raye 2010 (is it just me or did anyone else notice that fadli has never grown up since the first photo? strange kid, time seems to stop for him, and he is trapped in the same body every year!)

to conclude this entry,

no matter what we do

and how we do it

'we start and end wif a family'

aure voir, a plus tard!

Sunday, July 3, 2011



ca va? well, well, well, i'm making a comeback. u just wait.

nvr mind,

my fingers are itching to write now.

i am on holiday

summer holiday

i love the seaside and going away.

but havent got nuff money for the going away

so i opted for the former, seaside, which is more economical.

it's located in folkestone, hence the title.

so in the beginning, i was planning to build a sandcastle.

but u can imagine my surprise upon finding out there wasnt any!

guess this beach is like no other.

strange beach.

so we just camwhored.

which is kinda cool too.

the photos fill me wif cheer

thinking that it just costs me 5.5 pound

for this trip


next time i'll bring my swimsuit.

the sea water was like freezing cold!

the gojes fiza wif her gojes dress. might look good on me too, dont u think?

doing some kind of hat trick.

magic, isnt it?

thank u.

up next, more cool stuff.

for now, i'm out.

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Friday, May 6, 2011

Monday, May 2, 2011

Friday, April 22, 2011

Monday, January 3, 2011


2010 has been the best year ever in my life. the beginning of my life as a student pursuing my first degree in England and a year of wonderful journey. i shopped a bit. travelled a lot.been to places i'd never imagine in my life, did some volunteering and sports,been to an english school, learned how to swim, how to fence and how to ride a horse. and for all these great experiences, THANK YOU ALLAH...never stop counting my blessings...

our very first arrival in the uk. just look at those innocent faces.

my campus



drama staging
sandgate primary school

rome, italy

prague, czech republique

atomium, brussels, belgium

amsterdam, the netherlands

berlin, germany

disneyland, paris

eiffel tower, paris, france


roman bath

windsor castle

london bridge


volunteering at strodepark foundation

horseback riding

awesomest bestday bash

edinburgh, scotland

the biggest flowerpark in the world

second snowman

sledging moment

chelsea stadium

arsenal stadium


madrid, spain

stratford upon avon

cambridge day trip
all in all
wishing you guys a great and wonderful year ahead!